A Year in Review - 2007

I've been reflecting on my year... the year 2007 that is. Did much happen?

I've learned about:

• Swaddling and my complete inability to master it
• How, for the first three or so months of a person's life, getting up at midnight, 3am and 5am oddly becomes expected. However, despite what anyone says, it's never pleasant. You adjust, you adapt... you gain more and more appreciation for your wife who takes all this in stride.
• How, when in pre-natal classes and the teacher informs you that you will at some point have a urge to shake your baby and you think that seems harsh, you understand with full clarity at 4am
• The first time your baby grips your finger, it's the coolest thing
• You're often tired and can't remember not being tired... and this is with your wife doing yeoman's work during weekdays so you can sleep and be somewhat alert for work
• Babies come with stuff, lots of stuff... you go somewhere, you've got a lot of stuff to bring/carry
• My job is to carry stuff
• Thinking of yourself as a parent takes a while... it's fun to say in the abstract but it takes a really long time to really think of yourself as one.

This was going to be a lot longer post but it took me roughly 2 months. I'm working on doing this better... blogs and parenting!

Mommy's impatient

4 days late now... the long weekend, here in Ontario, went by without so much as a "I'm on my way soon" from Smidget. At least we got to do some of our short-term plans, like see a movie, swim etc...

Mommy is definitely impatient now. She's reached the "Ok, I'm done with this part, let's go" stage which oddly enough has not improved my sleep patterns. Anytime she moves now in bed, I semi-wake up and think "is this it?? Is it time??"

Myself, I was two weeks late. They won't let that happen anymore. At most, 10 days. I can say with absolute certainty that his birthday will be "early August".

What do you do during this waiting period? I feel almost like a doctor... never completely able to relax when on-call. I haven't been more than 5ft away from my phone OR line-of-sight of my wife in quite some time. I haven't seen my loveable dog (being watched by my parents in Toronto) in over two weeks... We make plans with the caveat that we can't really commit. Feels like I should be doing something... just not sure what!

I can't read any more books on fatherhood, or labour, or being the 'birth partner'.

It's kinda boring, really. I'm sure I'll be craving this period of peace soon enough...

The waiting

Well, the due date for Smidget has come and passed.

This waiting is an odd experience. At the same time, I both am anxious for the big day to arrive and spend much time picturing it... and yet, I still want to be out and doing things! It's quite strange not really being able to make plans or commit to anything. We make tentative plans... and then I want him to hold off because I then want to do those plans! Back on the other hand, I'm eager to get this new phase of life started so I/we can figure it out and get accustomed to it so we can shape the rest of our lives around it.

So we sit, and we wait.

Butt out

I've been giving a lot of thought to the issue of smoking... which I abhor. I'm not going to get into a persons' rights or anything like that... you want to close yourself off in a room and puff away, be my guest. Where I have an issue is, of course, when this smoke hits me.


I apologise for any generalizations... but it seems that many smokers have a different set of values or rules for behaviour. I was entering a mall last week and two women were walking ahead of me, one smoking. Just before going through the door, the woman tossed her butt down and squashed it with her heel... and proceeded to enter the building as if the butt no longer existed. Apparently her magic foot made the butt completely vanish to her. What's up with that?? I also routinely see butts tossed out car windows... outside office buildings, sidewalks etc.. what's in a smokers mentality that the spent cigarette vanishes from the earth?

I'm getting more and more aware, even before Smidget arrives, of what tiny people can pick up off the ground... put in their mouths etc. The example of the woman outside the mall? Going in the entrance to Sears and the baby section.

So how do you discourage smoking? There's lots more info out there now about the dangers of smoking than when I was a kid so that should help... The health dangers are well-documented, one only need look at someone who's smoked for their whole life, sallow faces, hacking cough... spot 'em a mile away.

I wonder about the technique my dad used on me... before I was born, apparently he smoked cigarillos. I can recall a time, I was maybe 3 or 4, maybe 5... he sat me down in my room, with a little table and a BIG glass of water. He had me take a puff. It was the worst, most vile thing I'd ever tasted... that water was drained in no time. Never ever wanted to touch one again.

Hmm... I wonder if that was an anti-smoking technique or if he just wanted someone to smoke with...